Metal Exposed!

Bote · Post by **Bote** » Wed Jan 05, 2005 12:42 pm

Kai Stromler wrote:
MANOWAR:

On a Night Of Black Thunder, the Metal King arrives on his Iron Steed of Black Wind, Fire, and Steel. He Plays Some Random Notes Of Extreme Metalness Really Fast on his Mighty Metal Guitar, Setting Fire to a Tower Of Gigantic True Metal Speakers the Size of Brazil, then Slays the Dragon with his Invincible Sword and Hammer of Unstoppable Metal Power That Are Totally Not Phallic Symbols Or Compensating For Anything. He Enthralls the Princess with his Mighty Rod of Manhood and Bears Her Off for Much Fucking, because he is Totally Not Gay Or Anything.

ROFL The capital letters! The capital letters!

oldwrench · Post by **oldwrench** » Wed Jan 05, 2005 8:06 pm

Old guy thinks, metal =

Org Profile · Post by **Otohiko** » Wed Jan 05, 2005 8:18 pm

oldwrench wrote:Old guy thinks, metal =

I think that too.

Does that mean I'm old?

Kajino Rei · Post by **Kajino Rei** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 4:04 am

Otohiko wrote:
oldwrench wrote:Old guy thinks, metal =
I think that too.

Does that mean I'm old?

Yes, but so am I it seems.
Ah, well who cares?
Any kind of Rock forever...
~~~
Kudos to all of you guys especially:
bote ~ That was sheer genius.
nailz ~ Truth.
Warheart ~

God bless these kinds of threads.

SkYfireLemonade · Post by **SkYfireLemonade** » Tue Jan 18, 2005 8:59 pm

Pure genius- but where is that drunken 50 year old mother wearing her Slayer shirt and dragging along her demonic, annoying as hell little brats to virtually every show that exists, who yells at her little heathens in the dragon's FUCKING EARS AND BLOWS CIGARETTE SMOKE INTO HIS FACE WHILE ATTEMPTING TO START A CIRCLE PIT WITH THE PRINCESS BEFORE THE SHOW...EVEN... STARTS. Obviously the princess isn't wearing the proper shoes for such activity, and, thinking what a rude bitch this woman must be...shoves the cigarette down her throat and feeds her to the hardcore kids with the black shirts using a spork, the most useful invention known to man. Then the protagonist eats the kids, thus saving the day. And Dani Filth the gay Vampire shows up and um...dies.

THE END!!!

Kai Stromler · Post by **Kai Stromler** » Wed Jan 19, 2005 8:07 am

I can't much identify with that situation, but anyone who knows Death Kristjan gets +100 points in my book.

TREU EVIL DAGESTAN INTERNET METAL:

The protanonist arrives, spilling misspelled words like blood off an Aborted cover painting. He exhumes the thread from its grave with mighty necrolust and steals its parts for use in a treu balck Satlanik retuall that will involve sodomizing a sheep. Somewhere in the distance, a banjo plays an extremely evil folkic intro.

--K

atrophiedXlungs · Post by **atrophiedXlungs** » Thu Jan 20, 2005 2:09 am

bote wrote:> GRIND METAL:
>
> The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable
> for about 2 mintues and then leaves...

I think this one needs some sprucing up.

GRINDCORE:

The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable (possibly a long chain of Philip K. Dick references)for about thirty seconds and then leaves...

=D

Kajino Rei · Post by **Kajino Rei** » Fri Jan 21, 2005 8:57 pm

atrophiedXlungs wrote:
bote wrote:> GRIND METAL:
>
> The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable
> for about 2 mintues and then leaves...
I think this one needs some sprucing up.

bote is god.

What are you talking about?

God bless these kinds of threads.

atrophiedXlungs · Post by **atrophiedXlungs** » Sat Jan 22, 2005 3:02 am

The time was way too long. I mean, seriously, I can count the grindcore songs that last about two minutes on one hand.

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Metal Exposed!

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