-
And people call me weird...
2002-03-20 16:27:47
What tetzlaff said reminds me of what what one of the regular goers to the FireArms mod posted a little while ago (about cyber-sex). Below is content of his post:
---
When cyber sex goes wrong...
---
Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse and a miniskirt and high heels.
My measurements are 36-24-36. I work out every day. I'm toned and perfect.
What do you look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a
pair of blue sweatpants I just bought at Walmart. I am also wearing a
T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner - it smells a
little funny.
Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me?
Wellhung: OK.
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on the stereo
and candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking up into your eyes,
smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle
your huge, swelling bulge.
Wellhung: I'm gulping. I'm beginning to sweat.
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are trembling.
Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure. The cool silk slides
off my warm skin. I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and I accidently rip a hole
in your blouse. I'm sorry.
Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
Sweetheart: Don't worry about it. I'm wearing a lacy black bra. My soft
breasts are rising and falling, rising and falling, as I breath harder and
harder.
Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra. I think it's stuck. Do
you have any scissors?
Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly. I'm reaching back and
undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my
breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the
clasp.
Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue
all over me.
Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts.
They're neat!
Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling
your ear.
Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and
phlegm.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.
Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my
blouse.
Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a
plop.
Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweatpants down and rubbing your hard
tool.
Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in
and out, nibbling on your ... umm ... wait a minute.
Sweetheart: What's the matter?
Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
Sweetheart: Are you OK?
Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
Sweetheart: Can I help?
Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through
the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
Sweetheart: I'm on the bed, aching for you.
Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And
now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark. I'm lost. Where's
the bedroom.
Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
Wellhung: I found it.
Sweetheart: I'm tuggin off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.
Wellhung: Me too.
Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately - our naked bodies
pressing against each other.
Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
Sweetheart: Why don't you take off you glasses?
Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses
on the night table.
Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and
toward the bathroom.
Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
Wellhung: I find the bathroom. It's dark. I'm feeling around for the
toilet. I lift the lid.
Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I
can't find it. Uh-oh!
Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry
again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my ... you know ... thing ... in your
...you know ... woman's thing.
Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your
neck. hmmm, I'm having a little trouble here.
Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it
another second! Slide it in! Screw me now!
Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around, an incredulous look on my
face.
Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy.
I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my
underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet, nasty blouse.
Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm
feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture
frames and your candles.
Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of your
candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a
shocked look on my face.
Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!
-
Glug glug glug, I'm a fish
2002-03-20 14:32:43
Today is the first day of spring break because the quarter ended yesterday. That and the rain has made for a fairly good day. Anyway, the following images are of this strange yet funny person I know...no words can explain the pictures though.
http://www.geocities.com/Rebus_Valstay/Images/Smile.jpg
http://www.geocities.com/Rebus_Valstay/Images/Paper.jpg
Gez...I need a beer. - Yeah...about time too 2002-03-17 21:14:38 Finally made my computer back into a server as I couldn't find any better hosting solutions. I hope that Apache is actually working and that the few people that have hit Lament are actually about to download it. I was tracing IPs and I found out one download originated from Yamagata, Japan. 0_o. Neat little tool. Back to studying for me.
-
More mindless spam
2002-03-09 14:19:27
Yeah...another stupid flash document.
http://cpufailure.com/cute.htm - To MCWagner: 2002-03-09 14:03:30 I always felt let down by the commercial mods to HL. You might want to try downloading FireArms though as it is a good free mod if you have the ability to play online. HLRally might also be good if/when it is released considering it'll be the first racing mod (that I can think of) for the HL engine.
JOURNAL: Rebus_Valstay (Kenneth McQueen)
Current server time: Jan 01, 2025 05:01:51