- forgot to say.... 2003-09-15 22:01:49 STOP WASTING YOUR LIVES!!!!!
- Last One... 2003-08-08 18:53:10 Im probably sure no one here cares about this but might has well post. Im going on another hiatus. Why, pobably for the same reason has my last one. Most of you might think when reading this 1)Who are you or 2) When did you even take the first one. Well it was during the time of the phorums. Well I found while trying to edit earlier today Iv lost it again. The will for editing. Im gonna have to take a break form this place if im gonna make anohter video. I also need some energy. Ramune, Fire, Subzero, Wild Cherry. The basics. And I guess with this I leave. Its not like anyone is gonna read this anyway. :/ Later everyone.....
- Otakon HaTES me... 2003-08-05 10:15:11 I submitted my video and sent in the slip with all the information on it just like everyone else did. I got the e-mail form otaku video saying everything good. The finalist list comes up and my names not there, doesnt matter, has long has it gets show in the video room. The list of people who are being seen in the video room was sent out, my name isnt anywhere on it. otakon hates me... :(
- I can read!!! 2003-07-25 13:44:17 Looks like i actually have something wroth tyoing this time, sigh. Schools gonna start in a little under a month, woopde do! You cant tell but im being sarcastic. I have nothing to be happy about yet nothing to be mad about, i guess thats normal. :/ thats pretty much how i feel about now, like i am wasting my life. I mean there is more than just this right, just being here day after day. The road pretty much ended a while ago yet i set up camp at that point, i need to move one, really. I dont like living like that. Wandering would be nice, i kinda always wanted to just wander from place to place, it seems liike a nice life. im the type of person who needs to see the world. Well enough metephorical jive from me, time to actually make sence. I have no idea what to do with the new school year ahead of me, it weird. I have to deal with the ROTC which iv had second thoughts about it, i see some evil in it, the corp might be corupt. the AI seems not to care about anything. the new BC seems like he wants to shape the new corp into something good i wanna see what he can do, i wonder. I still cant believe i passed to the next grade tho. I seriously slacked off last year, majorly. I skiped school, skiped class, or just didnt do my work. I almost failed Biology Algebra and English I. I told myself I was gonna push myself this year and I am going to try. Most kids nowaday think school is a place to socialize. Come to school drink party hook up fight. Anything put learn. Its sad really. Dont get me wrong, im not saying im a school boy that i wanna just rad and be a dork, hell no. Id probably die from that. I somewhat already am. I might have mentioned this in an earlier entry but after the first semester last I transfered schools, to my home school. I dont know why in hte sam hell i did. wait, yes i do. It was stupid reasons really. I was goign to another school on the other side of town for 2 reasons. it was a self proclaimed technology school and I didnt wanna go to my home school. I actually somewhat liked it there. the ROTC was fun. I had good friends and the classes were way easy. I liked it there. But like i said I trnasfered for stupid reasons. I had many enemys at my home school, some of which I had from middle school, some of which were destined to be made. I didnt know anyone really, I mean no one. All conection I had to anyone were severed for reasons I might post later. I swear my life is one big soap opera. Lucky I didnt cut them all, I knew enough to keep some friends the thing is, not the ones i always hung out with, or my best friends. No those people were either gone or enemys. Ill explain this whole thing later so it makes sence. Anyway the friend i had were ones I didnt always hang out with or ones i really knew, just people i knew and they knew me and we were cool with each other. So lucky I could hang with them. But it wasent much. Actually I did have one good friend now that I think about it. She was my girlfriend for a brief period over the summer before school, we did break up but it was for reasons we both understood well, she still had feelings for her old boyfriend, my ex best friend. anyway like i said it couldnt last for long. I needed a friend. I never really got one. You could somewhat say I was a loner the entire year. You coukld say i was mizerable too, and NO i didnt spell it wrong. I spelled it just like i should of. Well the year is over now its summer and nothing has happened. I somewhat ended everything by doing nothing. You could say i bored everyone to death, so its a tie right now. Its weird, no i just am. oh, about that whole thing i said id explain, this is it right here. I had 2 best friends, a guy and a girl, i got with my girl best friend, we went out for a long time, well for me it was long. my best friend had a girlfriend, but there relationship was always on the rocks, im surprized they didnt kill each other. Altho one almost killed themself. anyway soon my relationship with my girlfriend started getting bad, soon i told her I didnt like her anymore but that I had no idea what I felt period (Take into consideration this is my first girlfriend and im completely inocent in this field of things) she was hurt, i just did know it, now that I look back i said some thing i really shouldnt have. So about 3 days after i did this im talking to my best friend, the guy one. he tells me something i didnt expect. He broke up with his girlfriend and got with mine. Now technicly i wasent with her but i didnt break up with her, we were in a very akward space. I just kinda lost it and hacked her e-mail. something i regret to this day. I honestly dont remeber this part very well seeing has i went into a depression for about 3 weeks. I think from what I can scrap up her dad lived in dallas, her parents were deivorced, now he signed up for a job down san anotnio which she would have loved cause she likes her dad but never really shes him, or i dont know I dont remeber well. anyway he used her e-mail for a means of contact with the job, if he got the job. Well I hacked it and deleted everything and spammed the account not to mention changed the password so she couldnt get in. I relize no im a complete asshole for it. She hates me to this day for it and everything i might have done. at lest i think she hates me. iv always wanted to go up to he in school and tell her im sorry but I think it might be better to let sleeping dogs lay. I relizes i lost 2 very good friends that summer over something very stupid. They broke up 5 month later, I never knew the exact reason, but i actually did messeng her about once, she said he started acting like me. I dont thats a good thing. Iv never spoken to either one of them since. oh and about his ex, shes a whore now. its really a sad series of events. I lost my 2 bests friends and a friend who was very good to me. I dont talk to her either now. Next year has to be a re building year. I wouldnt have it any other way. maybe more later
- *sigh* 2003-07-04 20:38:38 I just had to format my computer, every single file I had is now lost but backed up on CD which is an ok thing I guess. The reason for all this, my comp was already messed up and didnt want to accept my new DVD ROM drive. Well, i gotta restore everything now. Itll be awhile before it feel like my comp again :/
JOURNAL: The Non-Professional (Jay Sauce)
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