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I think i'm hated......
2004-05-24 09:44:36
I'll explain the title in a second....but first, the weekend kicked much ass. The trip was fucking spectacular. We went to a mall in harrisburg(which means i now have the high score on the sniper game in two malls) and i added a couple of mangas to my collection, by buying love hina 3 and 4. I gotta get 1 and 2 back from steve, cause bren still needs to read two.... i also gotta go buy number two of dot hack.......::sigh:: anyway, back to the title...
I dont know why, but on the trip a lot of people kept giving me that evil eye. You know the one. It makes the person look like theyre trying really hard to take a shit but just blew a blood vessel and are blaming your for daddy not hugging them when they were 4. Anyway, I just figred it was the sun in my eyes or something, and carried on. Then i ran out of excuses, because the sun went down. But that aside, i had fun. Will got a little mad because i hooked up with some girl at the park and he didn't, which was a much needed blow to his ego. I guess he needed something to keep him in his place. But earlier that day, we skipped 4th period(as we usually do) and went down to the gym to play hockey, which i subsequently kicked his ass in. We played two games, my team won the first 6-3. then, the other team decided that the teams were stacked, so we switched teams(me and will only) and i kicked his ass again. the official score was 9-8, but if you dont count the times when i got body checked and held on the wall, its 9-6. Not a bad day. But will was ever so pissed. hes gonna learn one day, that i'm just that much better than him at the game of hockey. we each have our sports. His is tennis ::hehehehe:: Mine has been hockey since i was 13. I dont mean to brag, but the only reason i think i let by that many goals, was because all the kids we played with are on the schools hockey team ::ahem:: championship winnign team, mind you. I feel happy now. Will still isnt getting over the fact that i found a girl and he didnt..........
-Later
Doc
"I have come so far, just to be with you, but i'm nowhere close, theres still so much to do, you have passed me by nothing left for me. You think your so high up, i think one day you'll see"
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Screw this! These baners suck!!
2004-05-21 09:57:31
Sorry about yesterdays entry, i was a little too preoccupied to keep up with my usual form of actually saying goodbye and then leaving a wuoted at the end of my entry. ill try not to let that happen again. Anyway The trip is finally here!!!!! today i'm going. Its gonna kick ass. Oh, and the Flyers beat Tampa Bay last night, forcing a game 7. That pisses me off. I want Tampa to go to the finals, and hopefully wrestle the cup away from Calgary. But, enough about my preference of sports and the teams that play them. I've kept true to my word and havent touched an amv in almost a month. It may have been shorter, but it feels like a while, id have to think back....but i wont. I found out that this one girl i hang out with likes me. I kind of like her, but i'm not looking for a relationship. I dont want to do anything with her, because it would be a litle cruel to lead her on like that. But i dont want to just ignore her. And ive tried the whole "tell her how you feel thing" she doesnt understand why i dont want a commitment. (fortunately this talk was before i discovered she had feelings for me, so i didnt disrupt anything) I dont really have a reason other than i just dont want to. Its wierd, after my last couple of relationships, i guess i just feel kinda spent on the whole "undivided attention" thing for now. I'm not gonna be like this all the time, i just, jesus, thats what i mean. I dont have anything past that! that is quite literally my whole defense. ::sigh:: I'm sure i'll figure out a solution(or at least a real reason for my unwillingness)
I'm out
-Later
Doc
"I was so close that was the most that i had ever been through; now old cassettes and cigarettes will be the ones to save you; how can you ask for me to stay when all you ever do is go?" - .....::ugh::: i'm starving...... *_* 2004-05-20 10:49:01 It's not good to write on an empty stomach. not really good to be on an empty stomach, now that i think about it....anyway, i'm making a comic for my final in photoshop. I'm kind of looking for sprites to put into photoshop and make the comic from them. My "partner" is totally tripped out, in one of those really mellow states. The evils of robotussin....hes all like XD and i'm like O_o. i'm still waiting for friday to come around, because my trip is then. ::hunger nearing....ugh:: i'm also really excited about the progress the bands making, with the show and our album being recorded right now and all. Were coming along pretty good. two years ago i didnt even know a couple of these guys and now we are recording a CD!!! pretty cool, i think. (stomach churning) Jesus, i'm not gnna make it to lunch.... not good.....but i guess i can only hope that i dont get too hungry, cause then id be all like, pissed off and shit. but thats okay, its not lethal. I'm just bitching, really. God, G is so spun out. his pupil are like twice the size they should be. I love having computer class second period, because i get to post here every day, a luxury that will be gone once schools out, with the near-zero access i get to the computer at home. but i can still take pride in knowing that if anything ever goes wrong with it i'm the only one who can fix it, so i'll be given total control over it. AHHHHHH!!!! I HATE TECHNOLOGY!!!!!! this is really getting on my nerves
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All nighter!!!!
2004-05-19 10:01:17
my title is slightly misleading. I have yet to pull said all nighter, as it isnt until friday, but i figured id get into the happy before baring my soul to a largely anonomous group of people, many of whom i've never met and never will meet. It takes a lot of nerve, but at the same time its comforting knowing that most of these people will never come in contact with you to discuss your most intriguing of entries. that aside, the junior class trip is in two days, and were gonna go to hershey park overnight. theyve got a special thing just for high school seniors and juniors, and i'm one of the priveliged students who are going. It should be big fun. But, now back to the other stuff........
One of my friends is constantly telling me that i need a girlfriend. I say that hes full of shit and should try things my way, but hes convinced that what im doing is morally wrong and slightly condemnable. the way i see it, if i dont want a relationship, and neither does the girl, then its okay to fool around a bit. But, it seems that only me and two other people i know think that way. One of them is a teacher at my school.(funny, aint it?) I was talking with said friend one day, and the teacher said that she didnt understand why kids wanted serious relationships at such a young age. She thought we should just fool around and have fun while it lasts. I agree wholeheartedly. as long as youre not leading the other person on, then its perfectly fine. It seems that my generation(at least around here) has become a little too, i dont know, careful about everything. they dont want to touch somebody with a ten foot pole unless they know them. WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING TO THE YOUTH OF AMERICA!!!!!!
Since when were teenagers obsessed with being careful about everything!
I'm not denouncing the practice of protection and whatnot, but unless you plan on sleeping with a person, you dont need to be totally cautious. If youre just gonna hang out, kiss or whatever, you dont need to feel like you should be with this person all the time. I'm used to people complaining about others not wanting a commitment, but now its pissing me off that everyone seems to think absolute comitment is necessary for everything! Its' even got me ranting on about this! I dont normally rave aqbout stuff this much, but its spreading! thers a scarce few of us left that are okay with slightly(slightly, not completely) anonomous relations. If you dont know the person that well, dont do too much with them. The more you know a person, the more you can safely do together. Thats my stance. I'm not gonna fuck some chick i met an hour ago, but i'm not gonna sit on my ass the whole time and be "a good little boy" either. Moderation and a level head are what you really need to enjoy these years. Not a can of mace and fear of dying. that takes it all away. There only so much fun you can have until you reach a line. In order to get more out of an experience, there has to be some sort of risk involved!(i'm not talking about sexual relations anymore, so dont get on me about that) It's like a chaos theory. Six degrees of seperation from Hazard to happiness. Double or nothing is the best way to go most of the time (not all, i am still somewhat reserved) If you dont live life to its fullest during each stage of it, your going to be questioning yourself later. Did i get all I could out of it? Was there more i could have done? Did i miss out at all? I for one will be getting all i can out of life, and hopefully you will to. I'm out.
-Later
Doc
"Theres still tommorrow, forget the sorrow, i cant be on the last train home" -
::sigh:: this ripping off banners thing isnt working out...
2004-05-18 09:45:04
18 days. Thats all i have left until schools out. then the summer rolls around. Normally i would have been waiting for this for quite some time, but this year is different. Everyday that goes by puts me one step closer to my eventual fate of survivng the world. Not that i view it as some monstrous task, just that id rather continue life as it is then move on with it. I have to get a job over the summer, i've got to look at schools, and whatever other shit needs to be done. Ive also got obligations to my band which arent a bad thing, but sometimes it almost feels like a hassle to put up with them for all that time. But they are like my family, just as quirked and unique, and i couldnt deal without them. That and i have soccer over the summer. The coaches are trying to send as many kids from the team to a camp over the summer, which i want to go to, but my parents dont have the money. So that gives me and extra week that i didnt previously have. I've also got to get my book edited by the end of summer, and sent out to an editor, to give me some extra punch on my colege aps. And the bands recording our first album too. This music things finally starting to have some tangible payback, instead of "the joy of playing" fuck that. I'll take a few dollars here and there. I'm out.
-Later
Doc
"We were meant to live for so much more..."
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