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2004-10-29 16:04:35
Today I couldn't practice piano at school because there was Choir class going on.
I don't know what I'm going to do right now. I can't find Donna because I need to talk to her about cosplaying. I just came out of AP Eng listening to Edgar Allan Poe reading out loud his works of literature...on tape of course. It's not like he's still alive. yeah, my english teacher said that they dug up Poe's body recently and found that he did not die from tuberculosis, but from freezing to death. It seems that he came out onto the street, drunk, and I think he crashed into something or he slipped, but somehow he fell, and he died of freezing in the snow.
I think I finally ran out of things to say. For the first time, or I guess there may be other times that I cannot think of, in which I do not know what to write about. But then again, here I am writing about nothing. One time, I was trying to write a story, but I couldn't come up with an idea or a theme. Then I thought, well why don't I make a story about a person who could not think of anything to write about. But quickly later, I found that that idea is horrible. -
2004-10-29 10:53:13
So the I.E. a week ago...I didn't make it to Duo Finals because our story choice was bad.
On Sunday, it's Halloween, so the school dressed up today on Friday. People are coming in as devils, people from the 50's, in free dress. I came as a person in free dress...same as last year.
I hope that during Scriptures class we watch a movie "The Prince of Egypt" since we're studying Moses right now, and I think we finished Moses's whole story up to the point where he freed the Israelites, but vaguely covered the Ten commandment and 40 yrs. of walk through the desert.
I'm drawing on cards to sell for the anime club for our christmas boutique which is open to all people, not only students in my school. I made a christmas one, and a bookmark where if you have the bookmark sideways, the angel is flying, but if you put it vertically, the angel is falling into a waterfall. It wasn't that hard to figure out how the background would be, though.
For speech, I have to make 5 speeches for the next Congress which is in 2 weeks. someone told me that the speech moderator wouldn't sign us up for any other event except IEs and Congresses because she doesn't like the other events. that sucks. Anyways, I'll be going up against the people in A (advance) division now. That means no funny speeches made by other people, no rookies, and everyone...and I mean everyone is going to try and speak for all rounds. Do you know how many people that is? about ranging from 18-25 people! - 2004-10-18 18:44:41 Almost no time to do anything other than homework. Gotta memorize lines for duo interp. by this saturday. Must finish Scarlet Letter book by tomorrow because I have to write an impromptu essay on it during class as our bookchat.
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chemistry
2004-10-08 18:10:42
I understand how to name acids, finally. Last night, I didn't understand how to, but today, after doing some old chemistry program, I am able to actually do the worksheet she assigned. I also took an ion quiz.
For the next IE, I'm going to do a Duo Interpretation with M. We're going to end up in an argument in our scene. I asked S. how the competition was like when he went to compete in duo interp, and he told me how the competition was like.
I have to go to piano practice, and then take my lessons.
My school has a piano on the first floor, so I'm able to practice during my lunch period.
During some days in my schedule, I'm also going to meet a girl who wants to learn how to draw anime. Even though she's venturing off without me (which is the precise action that tells me that she really does want to learn), I'll be meeting her so that she doesn't have to spend 5 painstaking years trying to figure out everything on her own, unlike me.
I had to teach myself how to draw. A lot of people are surprised that that was how I learned. -
2004-10-04 16:17:58
There's a in my AP English class, and I used to want to get to know her because she can draw anime as well. After observing her from afar, (yeah, I know it sounds like a damn experiment) but I found that she seems to be...strange. She's always smiling and laughing, everyday...ever since freshman year. She seems to be too happy. So happy, that it creeps me out. I think she may be laughing out of politeness at someone's joke, but she always laughs at her own jokes even when no one is laughing with her. This thought of hers where she thinks she's always funny is annoying. It seems as though she is arrogant, and that's what I see most of the time: the laughing at her own jokes and no one finds it funny. That's really annoying. Not only that, but she has a funny way of speaking. Sometimes, her voice would go from high to low in her sentences. And she smiles whenever she says something. She smiles too much; it's unnatural. I'm not saying that being happy is a bad thing, but it makes me think that either she has the perfect life, or she is forcing herself to smile everyday. I don't know how she was able to manage having a lot of friends. Maybe everyone in my school likes to see a person who is happy all the time because this happiness exudes some sort of positive environment around them. Either that, or simply I don't know her enough to know the real reason. The main point is that she is too annoying. And she's in the anime club and....I should just stop. She's too annoying.
Not only is it her voice and her existance, but sometimes, I think she may be better than me in many things. For example, I can tell that people think her drawings are way better than mine, which in certain levels, I agree. She's in my AP Eng. class, and I know she is in Hon. Chem, which I have as well. She can play the piano while I'm still learning, and she is more amiable. My sentence may portray jealousy, and it probably is, but I don't know why I hate her. I usually don't have envy because I just naturally don't feel it much. I know that it's not her voice and her facial expression that I hate her for. I think there might be a more profound reason to why I don't like her. Maybe it may be something that she did to me that caused me to hate her. Maybe, it's because she has something that I don't. Maybe I just envy her. Maybe it's both. I want to find out, but it's hard to know the answer.
For some reason, there are not many people who do what I do. What Sigmund Fraud once stated that people should self-observe themselves. I forgot what the whole point of self-observing is, but as I grew up, the students in my old school forced me to do this.
My old class in grammar school were really mean. I didn't like them. Sometimes they would laugh at me, probably just to make me think that I did something wrong, and no matter how irrelevant the subject is, they're always thinking about....how should I put this..."sticking a pencil in a sharpener". During my time there, it was like hell. I was too intimidated to do anything or to argue back because they "hen-pecked" me into thinking that they are always better than me, which I disagree completely after I got out of that school. So everyday, I would have to try and figure out which student in my class are my enemy, and which one has nothing against me. Everyday, on my way home, I would just recap the whole day and pick out small incidents that they do to me, and unconsciously categorize who did how many mean things to me so far in my whole school life. Believe it or not, but everyday, at least one person would do something mean to me. I still remember some of them today. But this whole conflict between me and the class caused me to start interpreting actions that people do.
When I came to high school though, everything was very different. In my old school, I couldn't really keep my attention on the teacher because people would be trying to do stuff to me all the time, so I had to be alert. After a few weeks in my new school, I started to find myself actually paying attention to the teacher. I found myself not having as much tension in the classroom anymore, and I very quickly grew accustomed to not being alert, and meeting people who would be nice to me. Some people even stated that I'm smart because it shows through my GPA. Now that was something that I had never heard before in my life. Everyone in my old school would indirectly tell me otherwise. It's like opposites meeting. I really think that high school is better than my old school. I would go to school and for 3 weeks and more, I would not be insulted once or any negative action done to me. My brother told me that his class was not like that at all and that if I was his twin, I would be much happier in the environment that he lived in. That would probably give reason why he's more amiable than I am. Although, I tend to find befriending kids younger than me easier than being friends with kids my own age. I know that it's really strange the way this strange concept is upheld, and I can't change that.
JOURNAL: yeardragon
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