- 2005-04-28 16:21:42 Well, on the plus side, I had a presentation today, and I NAILED it! wooo. It was on a chapter in teh book. I'm in this anthropology/gender role studies class and I'm the only guy so its wicked intimidating to get up there and speak my mind, so I was kinda proud of myself. Most groups were up there for about 20 mins, but my group (another girl and I) talked for about 40-45 minutes. It was great and I think everyone actually enjoyed the class discussion we led. Besides that, I'm trying to stay in high spirits... :/ It's been working so far. I didnt sleep well last night, I think I must have woken up 9 or 10 times this morning. I might drink tonight because this weekend is a huge party weekend on campus and everyones starting early. I dunno if thats a good idea though. Normally I'm a real happy and friendly drunk, but with my current state of mind, that might change tonight. Oh well. I've been feeling kinda sick recently, so maybe I'll just take some nyquill and sleep til my classes start. Sleeping's fun.
- ... 2005-04-28 16:13:11 No dice.
-
more ranting
2005-04-26 01:28:57
Seems like all I do in this journal is bitch. Oh well, whats a journal for anyways? Things dont seem to be getting any easier. Well, except for tonight, that was an exception. I went down to C dorm to work on a project with my friend Jackie. Shes a junior and her roommates a sophomore, and for some reason i always feel real comfortable around girls who are older than me. So it was pretty fun, even though I was supposed to be doing work. I'll be honest, she ended up doing most of it. It was odd though, the end of the night, she walked me out of the dorm. Normally, its just like goodbye, cya in class tomorrow. Also she was kinda flirty the whole time we were there. Who knows, maybe we're just friendly like that, I do get pretty flirty with my female friends. In any matter, it'd be weird for me to date up, as a guy. I'd rather be a few months older. Oh well, she's a cool girl and I hope we stay friends for a long time.
But Julie's a real cool girl too. I finally ended up eating, though I really didn't have much of an appettite. Do what you gotta do I guess. Everyone went to dinner, and I didnt want anyone to think anything was wrong (classic Dan move, pretend like nothings wrong, keep it all inside) so I tagged along. I ended up getting a chicken caesar with bacon, it was pretty good I guess. We came back here and then I went over to Jackie's room.
~flash forward~
Just got back from her room a little while ago. Everyone is pissed at my douchebag roommate. I love it. He's like Eddy Hascall from Leave it to Beaver, he sucks up to everyone, and they dont really know hes a sleezball til they get to know him. I love when people figure out he sucks. He sucks a lot. Anyways, Jay (my other roommate) and I were gonna play some hallball, but he had to work on a project. Christian (my third roommate) went and got high. I'm jealous. Not that I'm much of a pothead, but it'd be nice to have some clarity right now, or to at least have some peace of mind.
I feel like the situation isn't getting anywhere but it should. I desperately want to act on how I feel, but my insecurities tell me to wait for her to do one more thing to confirm that she is interested.
It sucks because I have the picture she made me hanging on my desk. It says, "Dan the Man, I lov you". Yes, lov. She fogot the E. I think it's kind of cute. There's also a picture of a sunflower with a sail in it, because I told her I wanted to take her out in my sunfish (my boat) once, and later on she called it a "sunflower" by accident. Well, I liked it.
This has gotten to the point where I don't even want to play FFXI to take my mind off of things. This is a first. Kinda scary, huh?
Well, I'm excited to go to breakfast tomorrow, I'm meeting my friend Sierra there. We met at orientation, and she's really quiet so she never wants to come party with me, but she's a real cool girl. My first friend at my school, if you will. Anyways, I'm hoping she can tell me what to do. In the meantime... actually I have no idea what I'm going to go do. -
1, 2, 3
2005-04-25 16:22:41
3 Quizzes today! wtf is that. Well, I just finished the last of the three. Recap:
math: not so well
music: pretty good
bible:didn't study but still did pretty good.
But then again, the results aren't back yet, so who knows. I'm glad I had enough focus to even finish them, I was the last done with all three (usually I'm the first or second one done). So, I need to figure out a day when I talk to Julie about whats going on. I can't go into finals like this. I slept 3 hours last night and I haven't eaten since I got subway Sunday afternoon. I'm a train wreck right now ><. I've been trying to keep myself distracted, schoolwork, music, AMV's, ffxi....none seem to work. That fucked up movie last night didn't even take my mind off things, I pretty much half watched it.
I feel the need to be organized all of a sudden, so here's the schoolwork layout for the rest of the semester:
Anthro presentation: April 28
Anthro project due: April 28
Bible Final: May 2
Math Final: May 6
Music Final May 7
English Lit Final: May 9
Home for summer on May 10 (hopefully).
"don't waste your time on me, you're already the voice in my head..."
-
Saw this in someone else's journal, so why not.
2005-04-25 16:13:59
I feel like I'm in 7th grade all over again, but here it is anyways:
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Dan
2. Rags
3. Danny C
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. Ragnarok414
2. gtr_player014
3. DRC11486
THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. Sense of humor
2. Opinions
3. Friendliness
THREE THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. Shy at first
2. Haven't been to the gym in a month
3. Take things too seriously sometimes
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Being alone
2. "The Grudge"
3. The woods at night
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Friends
2. Music
3. Computer
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. White Martha's Vineyard longsleeve (rolled up)
2. Yellow boxers with penguins on them
3. Baggy navy blue sweat pants
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS (or artists (at the moment)):
1. Blink 182
2. Story of the Year
3. O.A.R
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
1. I Miss You - Blink 182
2. My Eyes Burn - Matchbook Romance
3. The Quiet Things that No One Ever Knows - Brand New
THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
1. Paragliding
2. Kayak across Vineyard Sound
3. Volunteer
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP (love is a given):
1. Laughter/flirtatiousness
2. Trust
3. Being involved in mutual interests
TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE
1. I'm 19 years old
2. I drive a '96 Plymouth Breeze
3. I can't stand the Final Fantasy series
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX (or same) THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. Eyes
2. Smile
3. Hair
THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
1. Allow something that's wrong to continue.
2. Cheat in a relationship.
3. Live far away from the ocean.
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. Playing guitar.
2. Sailing, kayaking
3. Going to the beach.
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Go sailing.
2. Resolve my current female-dilemma situation
3. Play volleyball
THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
1. Counseling Psychologist
2. Child Psychologist
3. who knows???
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Switzerland
2. Ireland
3. Japan
THREE KID'S NAMES:
1. Colleen (girl)
2. Dalton (boy)
3. Jennifer (girl)
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Own a nice boat.
2. Donate a very significant portion of my income to charity.
3. Make one person's life better.
JOURNAL: Ragnarok414 (Dan Costin)
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