JOURNAL: HarpersTrinket

  • Utter frustration 2005-12-22 01:34:42 They fight and it drives me insane! My mom and my b/f fighting and commenting like he was her kid. Then they talk about how rude the other one was but it's not like it doesn't take two to tango. Then he tells me he can't take much more of this and she tells me the same. Not to be selfish but I'm caught in the middle and get tugged on from both sides! My greatest fear is him leaving me, I'm already scared of that and this makes it so much worse. He told me he wants to marry me and then freaks me out. So here's the question, do I have to wait forever or will this work out? I mean, I did this once with my ex, believed him when he said that and then never saw anything change. And I trust my guy more than I ever did my ex...but I just wish something positive would come out of this week. 
  • Perfect 2005-09-23 03:45:28 Okay, I'm still happy, if a little frustrated. I mean, how hard can I push to try to do it all right? As much as I want to be I can't be perfect. I hope he doesn't end up expecting me to be all the time. I mess up too, don't we all?

    I want to sleep but I don't want to go to bed...my room just feels forlorn tonight, in fact, my whole house does. I hate fighting with people I love but fighting with him hurts worse. Maybe that's how love keeps you humble...the fact that you can't do it all right but someone loves you even when you fall. Like a mini-version of how God feels about us.

    So yes, all in all I'm still happy, just a little stressed. It'll all be okay in the morning...if I could just get some sleep.

     
  • Happy 2005-09-09 02:08:55 Well, I know I said I never do these and I usually never do but I'm happy and I felt the need to write that down for some reason. What can I say, for once it's all good for the most part and it's a nice feeling. Hope it'll keep up. Wouldn't you? 
  • Never 2005-06-06 03:25:25 I never do these journals, why anyone would want to get inside my head is beyond me...I mean have you seen it in there? It's scary! All those muses and cobwebs...ewww, half the time it creeps me out. So, in case you didn't know this is just mindless rambling at all un-godly hours...ahhh being a insomniac...so utterly annoying. Guess I should go take something to make me sleep. Night. 
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