JOURNAL: animefreakchick (Kat Barko)

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  • My mind 2003-08-25 17:29:56 FOR SOME REASON>

    My mind reminded me of all the sorrows I have seen.
    I myself being who i was raise to be, it is hard to cry for someone that isn't myself.

    SELFISH?
    maybe.
    But does that make me a inconsiderate spec.
    I THINK NOT!

    I am not like does that stick to the drama, I have a life.
    *i think*

    But for me life brings us CRAP.
    so they told me "deal with it yourself for we have no time for drama"

    Ok i want the drama BUT I don't know how to deal with drama.
    What do I do cry?
    *tears coming down cheeks*

    "FINE!"
    But for how long?
    because i have other things to do.
    And I don't have to deal with this CRAP.

    I lost someone. So I lost someone before this one, and before that and before that one. SO FORGIVE ME IF I DON'T STAY TO CRY.

    You can't mourn the things of yesterday because sooner or later they will be forgotten.

    They are like trophies, applause, and winners

    THE TROPHIES BECOME DUST
    body's become dust

    THE APPLAUSE LEAVES.
    their memory leaves

    THE WINNERS FORGOTTEN
    and we forget them.

    SO what is the big DEAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    You what you should do"Celebrate death"
    because they were fortunate to leave this world of SORROW AND THEIR LIFE THAT SUCKED ONCE IN THEIR LIFE.

    So forget about WINNERS OR EVEN DEATH.

    Because NO ONE remembers the trophies of YESTERDAY.

    Luv-
    kat/tonbo 
  • Alone in the world 2003-07-21 21:20:40 *tossing and turning*

    "oof "
    thinking: great I taught it would be better to be on my own.

    I love work i love my life i hate the bed.

    Now my battle lyes on my bed and my mind.

    Now i realize that the time well spent is best spent organized.
    Now i realize How precious times is .

    (a man in a clock suit passing by yelling the end is near)

    "See what did i tell you"
    The when is the end.

    What if there is no end.
    great someone answer me that is there an end
     
  • What category am I in? 2003-06-06 16:15:58 I don't feel like everyone else.
    So I'm not mormal.

    I have never fallen In love.
    So I'm not a lover.

    I don't inspire people.
    So I'm not a beautiful Light.

    *getting faustrated*
    AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! WHO AM I?

    Looks outside. stares at a dark corner for sometime.

    "maybe i'm darkness that has no meaning in life."

    THINKING: But I have dreams and I wish for a new beginning every day and a great part in life.

    Does this mean that I am doing hopeless wishing.
    I wish with no future.

    *starting to hit head on desk*
    "this is so fautrating!"
    "three cheers for the categorless Darkness"
    Darkness is just there what can it do?
    *stops hitting head on desk*

    (for some reason everything is dark but a beautiful LIGHT.)
    "How beautiful WHO IS THAT?"
    *trying to reach out and touch it but becomes father and farther*
    "WAIT WHERE YOU GOING?"
    SCREAMING: Don't leave me alnoe! I HATE BEING ALONE!

    (look down at darkness Falls down on her knees)
    "alone again."
    Luv^.^
    KAT/ Tonbo 
  • TRUTH! 2003-06-02 17:54:02 I am at lost at words.

    My mentor, my preacher, and my enemy.
    He told me That"I would rather live my life IN FAILURE in something that I love, than in SUCCESS in something that I hate."

    Tells me that life is all about words and how you make the words into your life.
    What would my words be?
    How will I live my life?
    If I am lost in my words, am i lost in my ways of being?

    I meet a guy.

    The poet. The man with true words.

    I told this guy, "How can I jump of a building that keeps on growing?"
    "How about you jump of first and then i'll see what happens?"

    He told me, "If you want me to jump off your imaginary building, I will. And with a big smile on my face." He also said,"make beautifulthings and live your life instead of the one put before you."

    Theses two men one whom I hate and one who I have just gotten to know told me the same thing.
    You want to know what!
    The fall doesn't seem so bad right now.

    *Thinking*Am i ready?
     
  • Life With No BELIEF! 2003-06-01 01:23:07 Is that possible?!?!?!? @_@

    NO no NO!
    (scratching head)
    THINKING:*WHATT!*

    A man that i think of as my mentor just told me thatmy parents had no strong belief that anything will EVER HAPPEN to them!

    HA HA HA^.^ I said,"you're joking right"

    "no it is possible some people actually can live like that.", HE said.

    I started yelling,"Yeah! but they live for a couple of years before they kill themselves.......!_! NO can't be...um..ARE you sayin' that my parents have no faith!"
    (he nodded)
    *END THAT CONVERSASION*
    Have no faith in the things in the future.. is ... is like ... AHHH! what I"M trying to say is....:(.. no point.
    you See faith is what wakes you up each morning because you are alive and kicking. Even if you wake up sad, unhappy, depressed, or even mad.. you are alive and you are breathing!

    Your faith is what helps you understand that whatever happens next with belief you can do great.
    A PERSON SHOULD NEVER HAVE THEIR FEET ON THE GROUND!
    (THud)
    *Not literally*
    "oh"
    O.o *winks* THUMBS UP!
    "I get it"
    Always be a dreamer believe that what ever you do it will be the best!
    *YEAH* =)
    ^.^ love KAT/Tonbo 
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