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2003-09-11 22:27:44
Everydayl... it gets harderto smile for some reason. I wonder what I'll end up doing tomorrow for pictures day. I feel like I have no heart. I don't know why I can't feel that warmth...
I wonder.. is there something wrong with me?
I wonder why this past couple of months.. I've had such luck.
Don't they say that people that are going to die tend to have amazing luck before they do?
I think that.. maybe all of ro's wishes.. maybe.. they had nothing to do with my current luck..
I think maybe I'm going to die soon.
I can't help it.. today is.. the chinese autumn festival.. in the lunar calendar today is August 15th. But it is Sept 11th.
I'm crying so many silent tears.. I'm so sorry keyboard.. I've gotten a tear on you. I've ruined your newness! ...
Right now.. I feel like burying myself somewhere asleep.. and never waking up.. ^-^... I don't want to hear everything around me. I don't want to do anything. I realize that I can't write about my values for career because unfortunately, I don't value myself at all.
I guess I'll do everything in the morning..
including showering.. -
first replies to Nnjswordpann!
2003-09-11 06:17:50
I'M LOOKING AT YOU MAY! YOU DO YOUR SHIT TOO! GRAR! You can then look back after high school and think, "Wow, good thing I did my shit! Now I go to college, and only go to class once a week! YATTA!"
end quote of Nnjapann
moo! but shyte requires thinking! THinking is hard! I don't like to think! MOO!
as for ro! All I needs are ro! Ro are belong to me! Ro are belong to meeeeeeee!! me happies!! but still kinda not feeling too well.. moo bra too tight.. can't get out of..diesings! >__< -
:)
2003-09-10 20:01:42
smiling makes everything feel worst!~ I likes being sad~! wheee..
must.. moo let everything stay inside... moo...
nothing is wrong ro.. just.. that... hmm... me having less and less meaning to learn to try to do.
moo.. the future.. I don't believe anything I'm doing now.. will really get me anything.. -
COme with Me~Koda Kumi
2003-09-10 06:54:53
Everyone.. I don't know whats wrong with me... maybe I'm lonely maybe I'm empty.. but I don't know..
what's wrong with me lately?
why am I still smiling..
how can I stand when all I want is to fall..
I don't ... want to be called anything anymore..
moo..
*poof* dissapppeaaars offliee! -
dry tears
2003-09-09 18:57:33
still tired. still wondering. still trying to find out myself
somewhere inside
I know it exists
somewhere there is warmth
somewhere inside there is warmth
but why does it feel warm
but there is nothing there
somewhere out there is a warm place
but its just cold here
all around me
tear
dripping down
emotion
why do I feel?
warm..
a heart perhaps?
warm
a lie perhaps?
warm a dream
warm.. an illusion
cold
a reality
awake
but dead inside
I'm happy
I'm sad
I'm both
is that bad?
JOURNAL: chutsupsei (ayu mai)
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