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2004-03-15 01:09:51
hmmm no quotes for today... just that... there's been something bothering me lately... it's been on my mind a lot and I can't help it.
When I close my eyes, it's still her that I see -.- I wonder if Sophie is alright... I haven't heard from her in 2 whole days... and I miss talking to her -.- I finally realized there's something important I gotta say and now she just disappears and has me worrying so much T.T
*siiiggghhhh anyway... I gotta remember we just friends tho >.< or maybe I'll try to give it another try... I dunno...
IN OTHER NEWS:
awwww I hope my lil sis is feeling better... she had a headache or something earlier and slept till 8!! >.< and she seems a lil lost... -.- well, I miss her too. I hope Sophie and Jess are alrite! And I wonder what that dream was supposed to mean...? lol afterall, it was just a dream right, ppl don't leave you behind like that -.-
kk and so ends another entry! -
2004-03-13 22:36:43
< Quote >
um...ummm.... omg...
why did I have to use this account?! whyyy!
um... I so dead now?
and I did care Clem .I did and always will . you never cared about me .
but.. I guess thats how things are meant to be .. things have changed ... I wish it hadnt.. um.. oh well...
*sigh.... starry night starry night ,to the planet thats out of sight ,if you say that its all true ,then to this world I bid adeau.. -______-
um.. should I be happy he doesnt care?
should I be sad? I've been hurt by so many people I've lost all feeling @.@
this is a good thing right...?
um.m... um.... ummmmmmm..... he's probably at p mall with sophie still..
um.. I should be happie for him right..? O_o
um.. anyways... should this be my last entry here? O_o
it should be @.@
I dont want to be @.@
eh well ,it wont be .
um.. so yeah ...
um..yes..
and um... Clem if your reading this .I dont hate you .I never did and never will .I've always cared and always will. havent you been listening to anything I've said ? I know I said I shouldnt care .that I wouldnt . I snapped, I didnt really know what I was saying or doing .. I'm sorry. no... sorries dont mean anything.. never have.. and never will... I hope you can find it in your heart and forgive me.. for saying that I wouldnt care ..
but.. its you who doesnt care.. you sounded happy that I was slitting myself.. 24 cuts.. you seemd so happy... it hurt.. it really hurt ,Clem...
but you wouldnt care ,would you? no ,you wouldnt . you never cared ,you never have .everything you've said about carings aboots me was lies! ALL LIES! wheeeeeee I dont care if I never get feeling back! I DONT CARE! I WISH I NEVER HAD THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE! aghhhh... ... ... ... ... ... ..
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... I wish I had my brother back.... I wish he'd come back.. I wish everything would go back to how it was before.. ...
I..I... *sigh...* I'm so selfish.. heh.. these tears.. hm.. too bad I cant slit myself no more... I could've watch my blood slide down my arm... blood..
what am I saying... eh...I said I wouldnt leave May.. and I wont.. she needs me... eh... @.@ damn you journal ,DAMMNNNNN YOUUUUUUUUUUU
< End Quote >
WHOA - What was that?? lol
Um... Jess? you wrote this entry at 9 something... how could I still be at p mall with Sophie? lol hmmm yesterday was Friday... oh wait... oh shyt I was... lol fine fine... maybe I am a lil predictable.
But anyway... OF COURSE I CARE!! and...
"um.m... um.... ummmmmmm..... he's probably at p mall with sophie still..
um.. I should be happie for him right..? O_o"
What's that supposed to mean? Why wouldn't you be happy...? You don't want me to spend time with her? 'cause then I won't.
Anyway, they aren't lies Jess, I'm glad you still care, 'cause I do too. And I didn't seem happy that you slit yourself?? I was just optimistic at the time... and nothing anyone said could bring me down... I'm sorry.
lol perhaps I should base my whole journal around reflecting upon your entries that involve me. - 2004-03-12 14:04:06 wow it's been a life time since I last updated this thing... -.- lol but then again... I wonder what has such a short life span? lol hmmm here at orbit at p mall right now... DAMN it's boring... dod isn't working... pisses me off... came for nothing -.- so tired... it was cold this morning! >.< hmmm maybe being nice wasn't a good thing? *sigh.. it's a curse I tell you! anyway... nothing exciting to say... so I'll just leave now... nothing to do -.- HUNGRY... awww need food... got rice? lol anyway... later
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2004-03-04 06:17:09
<< Quote >>
I thought he cared..
< he does.. >
he lied to me..
<no he didnt.. >
o..niichan..
< he's lost control ,he's confused ,he's been hurt ,take this time to help gather yourselfs together ,help him and he'll help you >
he doesnt care ,he never will
<dont be like that.. >
dont.. be like that..
its what he keeps saying..
< thats right.. >
I'm so lost
< you'll find you way >
you say you've been left behind
thats not true ,you left us ,not we left you
we've all been waiting for you to come back
but you dont care do you?
you still go ahead looking for the one
you forget we're friends
you forget who we are
I dont need you ..
< you cant survive on your own.. >
yes I can .
thats what he said ,he lied
I can ,and I will
I dont need him , I dont need any of you
damn you
<end >
<< End Quote >>
Hmmmmmmmm... I wonder... nah it can't b me that she's talking about ^^" it can't b... lol "still go ahead looking for the one" that does sound like me though... nnnaaahhhh she's probably talking about Richard or something... she doesn't care about me... she never did -.- - 2003-12-25 16:22:18 I'd just like to wish everyone on animemusicvideos.org a MERRY CHRISTMAS!! and for those who know the true meaning... hold on to it!
JOURNAL: cleel927 (DECEASED )
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