- User Name: ChildofNepthys
- Member Since: Saturday, September 4, 2004, 5:10 PM
- Name: Akya McKeown
- Location: Tampa, FL, Screwed-Over States of America
- Last Login: 2013-04-25 21:35:57
- Forum Info: Profile Posts (2)
- Profile: Right now we're suffering from a new, sexual, virulant disease contracted from highly dangerous activity. The disease is called Gonorrhea lectim(pronounced 'gonna re-elect him').
Many victims have contracted it after having been screwed for the past 4
years, in spite of having taken measures to protect themselves from this
especially virulent disease. Cognitive sequellae of individuals infected
with Gonorrhea lectim include, but are not limited to: Anti-social
personality disorder traits; delusions of grandeur with a distinct
messianic flavor; chronic mangling of the English language; extreme
cognitive dissonance; inability to incorporate new information; pronounced
xenophobia; inability to accept responsibility for actions; exceptional
cowardice masked by acts of misplaced bravado; ignorance of geography and
history; tendencies toward creating evangelical theocracies; and a strong
propensity for categorical, all-or nothing behavior.
So let it be known that:
Talk-Action=Nothing
and
Stupid Action=Global Detruction
Some things to Do Before the presidential inaugural in January:
1. Get that abortion you've always wanted.
2. Drink a nice clean glass of water.
3. Cash your social security check.
4. See a doctor of your own choosing.
5. Spend quality time with your draft age child/grandchild.
6. Get that gas mask you've been putting off buying.
7. Hoard gasoline.
8. Borrow books from library before they're banned - Constitutional law
books, Catcher in the Rye, Harry Potter, Tropic of Cancer, etc.
9. If you have an idea for an art piece involving a crucifix - do it now.
10. Come out of the closet - then go back in - HURRY!
11. Jam in all the stem cell research you can.
12. Stay out late before the curfews start.
13. Go see Bruce Springsteen before he has his "accident".
14. Go see Mount Rushmore before the Reagan addition.
15. Use the phrase - "you can't do that - this is America".
16. If you're white - marry a black person, if you're black - marry a
white person.
17. Take a walk in Yosemite, without being hit by a snowmobile or a
base-jumper.
18. Enroll your kid in an accelerated art or music class.
19. Start your school day WITHOUT a prayer.
20. Pass on the secrets of evolution to future generations.
21. Learn French.
22. Attend a commitment ceremony of your gay friends
23. Take a factory tour anywhere in the US.
24. Take photographs of animals on the endangered species list.
25. Visit Florida before the polar ice caps melt.
26. Visit Nevada before it becomes radioactive.
27. Visit Alaska before "The Big Spill".
28. Visit Massachusetts while it's still a State.