doughboy wrote:We can't really, cause your brief explanation leaves details out and seems random.android21 wrote:Well at least tell me what you think of the story..
She goes to school and fights? *need more details* Her first guardian dies? *How and what purpose does that serve?* She falls in love and love and gets married? *How does that effect her school life, and how old is she between going to school and getting married?*
The characters seem to be making random choices since we don't know their traits and abilities.
By all means keep at it, but without a detailed description of the plot/setting/themes, no one can help you or offer suggestions. It wouldn't be wise to post them directly here either, make it into word/text file and link to it for those that are interested (provided you can get temporary hosting).
!st guardian dies from old age. She quit school when shre was 17 and she married when she was 19 after being taught by Chao for 2 years. they go to live where Chao can train Miachuasha with no disruptions. then when her third guardian appears after Chao is done teaching Miachuasha she loses intrest in Chao and falls in love with Her third guardiad Named Tapion (not DBZs) and where still worken on the rest but my friend already has a plan to write the story in book form first then anime she has already written 2 books under my supervision.